Frustration By Dorothy Parker

If I had a shiny gun,
I could have a world of fun
Speeding bullets through the brains
Of the folks who give me pains.

Or had I some poison gas,
I could make the moments pass
Bumping off a number of 
People whom I do not love.

But I have no lethal weapon--
Thus does Fate our pleasure step on!
So they still are quick and well
Who should be, by rights, in hell.